Keep your hands to yourself

Travelling can be fun, especially when you cannot get enough of the beautiful sceneries outside your window. It can also be a nightmare, as my friend Nancy found out last week. Most of us never have the pleasure to choose who to sit next to. And aren’t we are all different in our own special ways? You can sit next to a woman nursing a wailing baby while balancing a bowl of pounded avocado. Or a Rihanna obsessed fan whose music is so loud, it won’t let you sleep. What about the old man who uses your shoulders as his pillow, and snores while at it? Even worse is the loud mouth who keeps spitting saliva and does not understand contortion on your face. Feels like hell, I know. Wait until you meet the one with the ‘touchy man hands.’   My friend met an all rounded one – Mr. Know it All with touchy man hands, and she had the worst day of her life.

She was travelling from Nairobi to Eldoret (going back to Moi University) and she wanted to get as comfortable as possible. So she sat at the back, sandwiched between two well fed African men. Her first ordeal, air circulation inside the packed matatu was terrible. Her only consolation was the fresh rush of air into the matatu, albeit periodically.

Still, she could take that. But somewhere near Westlands, her seat mate decided that he had to know more about her. He ranted about this, and about that, pointing at those buildings mushrooming in Westie, indulges in a little background history about them and not once did he slow down. He talked a little about himself, his work and HIS AGE! Yes he did…I am a 30 year old bachelor blah blah blah. I say it like she described it; a scene out of KTN’s Tujuane Show.  

Don’t get me wrong, striking a conversation on a bus or matatu is not a bad thing. In fact it can be the inception of a long lasting friendship or relationship. And travelling can get lonely, I know. But sometimes people just want to be left alone with their thoughts to torture them in peace. You are on your way back to school – assignments pending, a CAT coming up, a research project that you cannot seem to get past the topic and the biting cold of Moi University awaits you.

Trust this man to never leave you alone. Come on, you are only past Limuru. He then asked for her phone to make a call because his was off. He made a phone call alright, but to his phone which blared with Busy Signal’s Missing You. He now had her number. Smooth maybe, but treacherous nonetheless.

When they made a stop in Nakuru, he pulled the gentleman trick and offered to buy her lunch by pushing a 500 shilling note her way. Declining such offers is not just an African thing. Besides, he had put her through so much, it was the least he could do. She pocketed the money and headed out to get her lunch. My friend came back 10 minutes later to find him waiting patiently and smiling between his teeth.

Now he was smiling, woe unto her for accepting that money! The nightmare continued until they reached Eldoret.  Then he pulled a new move, this time reloaded. She felt his hands sneaking up on her thighs. Yes, his touchy man hands were slowly climbing up to the no go zones.  This is the point where she contemplated giving back the money. Then like a miracle, she spotted the conspicuous Moi University sign board at Cheptiret. Free at last, free at last, thank God, she was free at last. Martin Luther King would be proud.

                                     

Let’s get physical

Andrew Solomon, an American author wrote, “Exercise because it is good for you even if every step weighs a thousand pounds.” Good exercise does to the body what a good engine does to a car. It powers it and gives it health to cover miles and miles without breaking down. People exercise for a lot of reasons; to lose weight, to build muscles and to improve body health. Whatever your motivation, physical fitness is undoubtedly a master of body rejuvenation and conditioning. Three rules of physical fitness: eat healthy, do enough of body exercises and have plenty of rest.

The typical Moi University student consumes fries from Monday to Monday, guzzles down alcohol, sleeps at 4.00 am and watches a movie in bed after waking up at 10.00 am. It is a pathetic story but Moi University is not just a physical community, except for a few sporting activities and a handful of self-driven joggers and twilight dance classes. A friend of mine often says that she’d have to be insane to leave the comfort of her sizable warm bed in the name of jogging. There is the biting cold and it is the wee hours of the morning!

My friend (who I would like to keep anonymous) and a larger Moi University fraternity take physical fitness very lightly. Such ignorance could cost us; future generations would condemn us for creating such a sluggish culture and passing on the disease to them.

The university is partly to blame for cultivating this lazy culture among its students. To begin with, Moi University Main Campus does not have a standard gym to cater for the needs of all students. There is only a building masquerading as a gym with an ambiguous inscription ‘FITNESS CENTRE’. But it is never what you expect. It is just a dirty little room where boys (or should I say men) go to sweat and pant as they lift weights.  It would be nice if a female student could walk into the gym and exercise with the right equipment. Or are we all just supposed to lift weights?

According to an expert blog, swimming is rated as one of the best cardio exercises because every muscle of the body is involved in the activity. It thus enables the body to burn calories faster and tone the body muscles. The university does not have a swimming pool on campus that would motivate students to take up swimming as part of their daily exercise. If you are a swimming enthusiast, you have to go to Sirikwa (which is in town) and pay a fee before you are allowed into the pool. Maybe it is time Moi University left Sirikwa alone and constructed a swimming pool for its students.

Despite the large tracts of land that Moi University sits on and a terrain that is conducive for running, the university has never thought of harvesting the students’ athletics skills. What is the name of that Sports Director again? And why did we elect him if he cannot pitch such ideas to university’s administration?

If only the university would be as enthusiastic to set up such fitness facilities as it is with setting up a chips café on every campus corner, we would be the healthiest and the fittest university in Kenya.

“I wish I could lose this extra fat.” Bodily fitness is not built on wishful thinking. It starts with eating healthy and incorporating exercise in your daily activities. You can jog in the morning, dance (you could enroll for a salsa class and burn calories every week) or take up rope jumping among other activities. Get up lazy people and let’s all get physical.